So, going into this book, I really didn’t know a lot about what I was getting into. I didn’t think it was a self-help book. I didn’t think it was actually going to teach me about love. I did read a lot of reviews, though, that were disappointed that it didn’t do exactly that. What I do know about Everything I Know About Love is that it’s deeply personal. It’s an exploration of the most intimate kind into another person’s thoughts, insecurities, and feelings. That, in itself, is a feat above all others. It also seriously reminded me of two other memoirs that I’ve read recently: You Could Make This Place Beautiful by Maggie Smith and I Want to Die But I Want to Eat Tteokbokki by Baek Sehee. Both explored a lot about what it means to be human and how we examine our own emotions and feelings. 

Now, how I personally feel about that book has more to do with where I am in my own life than the book’s prowess. I liked this book. I really did. However, it didn’t resonate with me as I think it will with many other people. There are many reasons for this. One is because I hardly ever partied in high school, college, or even now. My personality always drew me to smaller gatherings. While I have felt lost in my career before, I don’t think I ever felt truly as lost as Alderton had in some parts of her novel (life). 

Dolly Alderton seemed deeply unhappy in her life for a long time. She looked to others for love, affection, and worth. I have had the extreme fortune to not have found myself in that position very often. Alderton, throughout the novel, tried to sum up what success was. Usually, her definition of success came from a man’s deemed worth of the woman. I fell in love with a man who didn’t make me feel worthy based on my looks or other physical attributes. I felt worthy from just being me. That came a lot earlier in life for me than it does for most, so while I liked this novel, I had little to relate to it. 

I do believe, though, that her points are extremely valuable. We should not find worth in what the world tells us to find worth in. We should value what makes us happy. Not what everyone else says should make us happy. Whether that is romantic love, love from friendships, love from family, or any type of love at all, whatever makes our hearts sing is what we should place worth in. 

Overall, I found this novel moving, humorous, and deeply intimate in the way that the author examines her own life. I personally would never be able to microscopically pick apart my life as Dolly Alderton has for us in this memoir. She is far braver and stronger than I’ll ever be. This book is perfect for those of us who feel lost and unable to find what makes us happy. I believe that many people will be able to relate to this even if I couldn’t. 

Source: Audiobook from Libby Public Library

(P.S. You can read this book for free by signing up for a free trial of Audible, which gives you two free audiobooks of your choice!)