What the fuck did I just read. Like. What. The. Fuck. 

I can’t even say that I liked this book. I honestly feel just kinda meh about this book. It starts off so slow. No, not just starts. It IS SLOW. Literally until the last quarter of the book. Last fifth even. You get exposition and backstory and even in the beginning, the author has Bel look at a book on her nightstand and say something along the lines of “it’s not good yet, but it’s about to be.” It felt like she was alluding to her own novel, but it never got good until the end. 

Let’s just start out with characters. You get Ash who is basically just the dollar store version of Ravi from A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder. He is set up as Bel’s love interest but I honestly never felt the connection between them. Then there’s Bel’s dad, Charlie, who is about as checked out as they come. Then, of course, you have Rachel, Bel’s mom. Boy did I feel bad for her. The main plot of the novel is Bel trying to prove that Rachel is lying and wasn’t in captivity for 16 years and is a horrible person who is back with an agenda. Even at the beginning of the book I never believed Bel’s crazy quest to prove that her mother was lying. Like, girl, obviously you need to go work on that trauma that never resolved after your mother disappeared. Okay, and lastly (and definitely not the best for last) is Bel. Phew. This character is a doozy. Remember Red from Five Survive and how absolutely boring she was? Right. Take Red and mix it with the obnoxious absolutely infuriating character of Oliver. I HATED HER. I hated her with every fiber of my being. Literally loathed. Probably worst female character I’ve ever read. How is this character coming from the same author who gave us Pip?!?!? 

Alright, to the plot. I guessed just about every single plot point in this book. Nothing that was revealed was surprising and I read it just to get to the end. I had to keep repeating to myself “I do not DNF books, I do not DNF books, I do not DNF books,” because man, I seriously wanted to DNF this book. The plot is boring as hell. The idea itself is anything but basic, but the execution lacked urgency and, well, any surprise whatsoever. Again. I just felt bad for Rachel the whole entire time. I kept thinking to myself that even if she was a lying, horrible mother, I still felt bad for her because of the way Bel treated her. Bel was just a brat. A horrible excuse for a human being. 

Back to actual details. The writing is good as always. Holly Jackson does not disappoint in her writing style. It was the characters and plot that lacked here. All you truly get is a little about this crew filming a documentary about Bel’s mother’s disappearance, and then poof she reappears. Hence the title. Once Rachel has reappeared, Bel is convinced that she’s some kind of evil, plotting woman. It gave me very Verity-esque vibes. Nowhere near as good, but I could feel where she wanted this story to go. So Bel investigates her mother’s reappearance with the help of her not-Ravi sidekick. 

I think the main thing that turned me off of this book is that I always felt like Bel was having some kind of manic, let’s point our judgey fingers, episode, so I never felt like what she was investigating was believable. Did I mention that I seriously disliked her character??

Spoilers ahead. 

Yes, Bel’s grandfather is completely deranged for thinking he was saving Rachel by keeping her locked up. Yes, Bel’s father is a completely sociopath. Yes, Jeff is the dumb and idiot older brother of said sociopath who accepts a contraband baby who is actually Rachel’s other daughter (aka Carter aka Bel’s cousin-not-cousin) and asks no questions as to why said baby looks so much like Rachel. Yes, I feel bad for Ash and the complete and utter destruction Bel caused to his tech.

Also, what’s so bad with just telling the police the truth?? Like, I don’t see how this could’ve caused all kinds of harm to their already broken family. There’s no way that they would’ve seen all the evidence and thought that Rachel was lying. Charlie was obviously a sociopath. Tell the freaking truth!!!

Also also, did anyone else get just a little concerned when Ramsey was like, “Oh, I saw all of the videos and the fact that your dad was chained up in a container, but I deleted for you. Have a good life, kiddo. I’m definitely not caring that this man who I know nothing about (and by my account should be innocent) is probably being tortured by you.” Was that just me? Am I the only one sitting here thinking that this man just let a murder slide without knowing any details? 

Overall, I really can’t say I liked this book at all because I really didn’t. It fell flat just like Five Survive did with me and only picked up in the last part of the book. Although, I do have to admit that this novel was way better than Five Survive. Severely disappointed that another of Holly Jackson’s novels left so much to be wanted. I do think, though, that as long as you don’t mind slow starts, this is a solid read. 2 stars for plot and characters. One whole extra star just for how crazy the ending was because, truly, that was the only enjoyable part for me. 3/5 stars total. 

Source: Audiobook from Audible 

(P.S. You can read this book for free by signing up for a free trial of Audible, which gives you two free audiobooks of your choice!)